Today

Today is a simple day.
Filled with simple choices.
With each simple choice comes a simple memory.
So make that simple memory a simply amazing one.

Is it?

Is it you walked out on the world or the world walked out on you?

Either way your alone.

Anger

Anger strikes as quick as a snake bites.

Quick, fast. easy.

ok i know

i know this isn't a poem but my turtles are doing it gross i know but my babies cant have babies im not ready for that yet

Dont pretend

Dont act like you care.
Dont come around.
Dont try and say sorry.

I listened to your words once before.
I believed in what you said.
I thought you meant those words that came from your mouth.
I loved i listened i cared.

You said you loved.

I took it all in thinking it were true.

At first i thought i was the fool.

Now i know im not the fool i never lied never pretended only trusted you.

So as you say your sorry and you still love me.
You still want to be with me.
You were wrong to leave.

I smile and walk away.

A Simple Smile

A simple smile

We all do it
Some better than others
Some poorly, some amazingly

I can be one of those amazingly people
One of those people who put on a simple smile to hide it all
We all do it I just do it well

You look at me
I’m smiling- your blind
You see happiness-I’m not
You hear it in my voice that happiness-your deaf
I touch you-you feel that I’m happy your wrong
Don’t think I’m happy
It’s all just a simple smile

Just a simple smile that’s all that I wear on my face
My voice is nothing but lies
I touch you to make you think I am
It’s all just pretending…

All but a simple smile
That’s all you see
That’s all that everyone sees

I put it on to make you all happy
To bring smiles upon your faces
To make you believe
To make you all believe

I hold everything in
I pretend things are wonderful
I know its wrong
I know its bad

When I let it all out you all look at me as if I have lost it
You think I’m a mess

There for I hold it all in
With my chin held high and a simple smile on my face

In front of you all im strong, fearless
No emotions escape
I’m the rock that holds you all up

Inside I’m scared to death
I’m weak
Inside I’m the bug under the rock
The bug that has been squished

I can’t let you all down
So a simple smile is what I wear

In the day I’m what you all want me to be
Strong, fearless, the rock, the shoulder to cry on, the one who does what is needed to be done,

But at night in my room by myself
The tears fall the shield is let down the real me comes out
The stress is so strong the worries are begging to be too much

I’m losing it
The thing that keeps me here to care for you all
The nights are so short the days so long
Tears is how I fall asleep
Numbness is begging to be all I feel

Happiness is gone
So a simple smile comes into view when I’m in the presents of those who I love

A simple smile makes so many others happy
But destroys the one who wears it

A simple smile hides it all
Protects what needs to be protected
Shields everything

I have that simple smile
I wear it all the time
I do it for the best

A simple smile makes it better
A simple smile shows everyone
A simple smile hides what I feel what I think who I am

All of you are happy because I wear this simple smile
With that simple smile come other simple things
A simple smile to let you see
A simple laugh to let you hear
A simple hug to let you feel

Nothing but a good liar

In the dark it’s anything but simple
To pretend when I know
Know its all a lie

My simple smile is an amazing simple smile
I’ve worn it for so long
That no one thinks its fake
I’ve fooled you all

Pretending is all I do in front of you

Nothing left but that simple smile
Everything gone
All happiness washed away with the tears that fall in the dark

Nothing but a simple life wearing a simple smile

In the dark I’m safe that simple smile washed away with the tears that don’t stop
In the dark its cold its lonely its home

Warmth shows me nothing but pain

The cold lonely darkness is where I’d rather be

The cold is truth
Lonely a way that I’m safe from being hurt
The darkness is safety

Sadness is hidden
Disappointment hidden
Loneliness hidden
My feelings hidden

I lost so much yet had so little

Everything disappears when that first tear falls

That small drop of water falls from my face
Builds up in my eyes
Over flows, streams down my face
The face that last wore that simple smile fades one more time in the darkness

Darkness hides my face from the world
It’s a barrier
Safety, peace, quiet, home

Day comes
The tears disappear
And that simple smile reappears

Everything all over again
All those simple things appear as if they were never gone
All just a simple smile to make others all right and me all wrong

As that simple smile reappears and the tears disappear
A part of me does with it
Another part of my feelings buried six feet under
More of me disappear until one day I’m gone forever…